Mammorial Day Hash

Run #1156, May 26, 2008

Hare:  Async

Location:  Buck Hill Management Area, Burrillville.

Weather:  70's, Sunny.

Present:   Amish It Head, Dr WHO, Bondo Jovi, Basket Boom Boom, Oozing SD, Eenie Weenie Dick, Fuwangi Boner. Visitors: Jimmy Crack-Whore, I Eat Cum, Counterfeit Dick, Super Chicken, Friar Fuck. Virgin: Just Stuart. Wankers: Dogmeat, Just Big Sh*t, Short Peck, Just Jodi, Just Summer.

The Run:
The run for Memorial Day, 2008 was anything but memorable. In fact, I can remember virtually nothing about it. But the hare has website privileges, and if he doesn't like this, he is more than welcome to edit, add, subtract, or falsify what little I can remember. I did keep a list of attendees, so at least that much is accurate. (Right!) And when in doubt, I always give Basket hashit in these writeups, so I've got that covered as well. No one reads these damn things anyways, except perhaps a few newbies looking for ideas for their first haring. I bet they won't get any good ideas from this one! So quit yer bellyachin' and go back to surfing net porn!

The start was at a dirt parking area off Buck Hill Road almost at the Connecticut border. A sizeable crowd of men were present; the few women participants in our hash being too wise to trek up all this way, especially knowing that Basket would be getting naked in his pool afterwards. And what kind of knucklehead would show up for this kind of abuse? Just about every active knucklehead in the RIH3. And visitors and a virgin who couldn't have known better.Except of course for Friar Fuck , who may in fact have no sensory apparatus whatsoever as far as we can tell. Promptly at 2 PM, they were off. Trail led north into the management area.

The visitors, being young and fit were soon leading the pack. Trail was mostly on paths, and through fields. There were several annoying checks leading to loops that could easily be avoided. (This was to allow Bondo to keep up. To no avail, however as he was soon lost.) Basket too, had ideas (a dangerous thing). He acted quickly and headed for the Tri-State marker. Luckily the visitors heeded Oozing's warnings and didn't follow. WHO was convinced that the trail would come out on Wallum Lake and as such, always checked right. This was usually wrong.

Amish and Oozing managed to keep up with the athletes as the hare slowly but surely shepherded them in a clockwise loop to the Beer Check. Was there a beer check? There must have been, because if there hadn't been, the memory of that outrage would have stuck with me. But it couldn't have been a scenic stop on the lake with a swim, good beer and snacks, as I would also have remembered that. No, it must have been some non-descript rock in the middle of the woods or something. Yawn!

Beer check dispensed with, trail back was probably straightfoward and wouldn't deserve description anyways. Basket and Bondo were found at some point, and Basket doubtless regaled the group with tales of his adventures. Double Yawn!! The group drove back to Basket's abode for the circle. It might have been in the pool, but I doubt it. The water was pretty damn cold, back in May.The run was rated.  No shiggy, no bimbos, and a beercheck that people were EVEN THEN beginning to forget! Total (artificially inflated by the presence of visitors who didn't know better): +0.0! The virgin probably came into the circle. He probably didn't have a song, and so told a lame joke. Perhaps that's why we haven't seem HIM again! Friar Fuck probably did have a song. Bad luck for us! Hashit: Basket! Told you so. And the evening was finished with a potluck dinner thanks to the charity and kindness of the long suffering Dogmeat and JBS .


On On