Another Bondo Bash

Run #1157, June 2, 2008

Hare:  Bondo Jovi

Location:  Woonsocket/Blackstone, MA

Weather:  80's, Sunny.

Present:   Let’s F**’n Eat, Basket Boom Boom, WIPOS, Dr WHO, Jovi Juice, Oozing SD. Virgin: Just Heather.

The Run:
Ah, June. Time for summer to begin. Time for the girls to shed those bulky winter clothes for shorts and revealing tops. Time for the long evenings of baseball and beer. Sounds great? But it's also time for another Bondo Bicycle trail! Why, why, why? Because he's lazy, that's why! As always, a trail was planned beginning from the hare's house in Woonsocket, looping around Blackstone, MA, and back. Nothing more really needs to be said. But to give the hare credit (painful as THAT may be!), he did put a little effort into this one.

It was an understandably small turn out. Only Oozing (who must be trying to offend this girl) brought a virgin/co-worker along. No one else had an excuse. (For future reference, these would be valid excuses: "It's a Bondo trail!", "I don't have a bike!", "I've got an important meeting tomorrow and I don't want diarrhea!", "The Woonsocket Police have my name on file!", etc. etc. )

The beginning was inevitable. WHO therefore led LFE up Woodland to a right on Gaskill. It then of course had to turn up, on one of the two side roads with entrances to the railroad grade. WHO and LFE tried the first on Warner. It was the second, and so the pack came together turning left up May and into the woods. The railroad grade was followed briefly northeast, and a check sent them north on what might have once been a deer path before it became overgrown. It wasn't even single-track, maybe one-thirds of a track or something. WHO took the first header over his handle bars. LFE and Basket soon followed suit. Jovi Juice had no problems with the terrain and led easily.

Trail turned east. Half walking and half riding, the branches and briars still whipped the riders mercilessly. The ground surface was dried sand, or leaves. Frequent loss of control occured. It probably would have been great fun to watch. It wasn't much fun to do. Eventually, they came out just north of St. Stanislaus Cemetery, where the hare indicated that his marks had been blown away in the rising winds. Bondo... wind... Hmmn! He directed WHO to turn briefly southeast on Farm. The hare then laid a fresh mark indicating the point of entry back into the woods on the north side of the road.

Jovi Juice, WHO and LFE drove through some more narrow, overgrown, uphill and sandy trails They finally came out into the sand and gravel pits, atop the edge of the main excavation. Biking now was almost impossible. Not that it mattered as no marks could be seen in any direction. Jovi Juice headed northwest along the rim above the river. He was not to be seen again. WHO and LFE followed along the same path; but became uncertain when no marks were seen. Oozing appeared on the top of the rise, soon followed by Basket and Just Heather . But the hare was nowhere to be seen. And still no marks! The group conferred. They finally agreed to head up to the river park on the Mill River where so many beer checks have been before.

They continued through the floor of the excavation, the wind whipping grit in their faces. Riding was difficult at best, so most pushed their bikes through the loose sand. They crossed a smaller excavation at the northwest corner, and took a dirt road out to Park St. Turning right to merge with Summer St, they came to the park and saw the hare's van. But no Jovi Juice . No hare. And the hare has upgraded his van locks, so NO BEER!

The hare was missing on his own trail. Normally, this would be of some concern. But, the beer was clearly in a cooler in the van. So the obvious course of action was to give the hare some time to catch up with the pack. So Basket took off to look for the hare. Brilliant! WHO says he wants the hashit!The hare appeared five minutes later. He opened his van and the BC was held in the parking lot, drinking Bondo-brew from Poland Springs water bottles. A nature-lover was parked in his car in the lot, so not a lot of singing was heard. Most were content to rest, thankful that Basket was gone. But all too soon, he returned, with more tales of heroism and trailcraft and so on, and so on, and so on.. So the rest threw an extra brew into the water-bottle holder and headed out.

There was no trail back, but this is familiar territory and most could have done it in their sleep. Summer to Farm to Gaskill to Woodland to Meadow. What a thrill! They circled up in the garage. Ratings: surprisingly good shiggy, complete loss of marks in quarry, a bimbo/virgin and loss of Jovi Juice led to a total of +0.69! Hashit to Basket, of course, for attempting to rescue the hare! The BBQ was fired up, the virgin departed to pick someone up at the airport, and the first rumblings of the digestive tracts from the Bondo -brew were heard. And thank God that's over with!

On On