Iceholes in Lincoln (Rabbie Burns 2008) Hash

Run #1191, Jan 26, 2009

Hare:  Amish It Head

Location:  Lincoln Woods.

Weather:  A Wee Bit Nippy, High 20’s, Old Snow .

Present:   Dr WHO, Wee Balls, Florence Wallbanger, Donkey Punch, Pubic Housing, Basket Boom Boom, Oozing SD, WIPOS. Visitors: Sackless Suction, Good Pie Hunting. Virgin: Just Brad.

 
The Run:
To celebrate the day after the 250^th anniversary of the birth of Robert Burns, a large gathering was expected by the hare. But only seven (at first) made it. And only WHO and Oozing wore their kilts in the proper fashion. Nonetheless, a festive assortment of kilts and schoolgirl skirts were displayed in the parking lot of an office building just west of 146. At 6:30, they were off, and predictably ran around the offices and east through the tunnel to Lincoln Woods.

The marks were light blue on snow and ice. With the normal slightly blue tint of LED lights, this made them almost impossible to see. Brilliant! The group found a check next to the parking lot. They milled about in every direction. Finally the hare indicated a mark crossing a field and heading northeast into the woods. Once on a path, it was slightly easier. Trail wound north to a point, and then out on the ice of Olney Pond. It had been above freezing for much of the day, but WHO worries about that?

A successful crossing to a small island was made by all. The hare stated that this was a “car bomb” check. A car bomb is some collegiate/adolescent technique of: a) not tasting hard liquor, b) getting drunk really fast, and c) ruining both beer and liquor, as far as taste goes, at the same time. The hare provided Jameson’s, Bailey’s, and Guinness. (How Scottish of him, for the occasion!) A shot glass of Jameson’s and Bailey’s was dropped into half a glass of Guinness, and immediately chugged. Pathetic, really. Not to mention, an awful lot of work!

While beginning to work on the second round, they noticed a light, back on the shore. And then another. And another. Four lights were seen, and the group on the island flashed their lights to entice them out. There was considerable hesitation, but eventually, WIPOS made it across. This was enough for Sackless Suction, Good Pie Hunting and virgin Brad to follow. The whole tedious car bomb thing had to be explained and practiced again, while the rest sang some more songs. They finally got ready to move on.

Trail led out into open ice, crossing the pond completely. There were patchy areas of slush. WHO would worry about that?  A second island was passed, and trail was now pockmarked with fishing holes cut in the ice. Unfortunately, the holes were easier to see than the marks, so no one fell in. They headed straight north to landfall on a peninsula, where the marks were temporarily lost again. This provided Basket with an excuse to get lost. He promptly did.

Trail led east, then north, then west. The road was crossed. A narrow uphill track was found, and this led to the beer check. Ah, it was lovely! No annoying tricks with shot glasses. No Bondo. No Basket. A fairly prolonged Rhubarb session resulted, virtually guaranteeing that the virgin will never try hashing again. But, fearing a late appearance by Basket, they finally packed up. Trail back came down to the road, heading southwest. It led back to the tunnel, and the cars.

The circle was held near the cars, pretty much in plain view. Ratings for the run: invisible marks, snow, ice crossing with slush, and a whole bunch of iceholes. Total: +6.9! The visitors were brought in and questioned, the virgin was deflowered, responding with a poor quality joke. Hashit went to WIPOS for no effort at costuming whatsoever, and because although Basket clearly deserved it, someone else needs a chance, now and then. Finishing up, they moved on to The Lodge, where the “Selkirk Grace” was followed by “Ode to a Haggis”, along with other favorites, as they washed their haggis doon wi’ ale and a’tha’. Hoots.

On On