Norton
is Too Far Away
Hash
Run #1237, December 14, 2009
Hare: Flexible Video Endoscope
Location: Salmonese School, Norton, MA
Weather: High 30's, cloudy, a little snow on the ground.
Present: Dr WHO, Wee
Balls, Can’t Eat Pussy, Rusty, Bondo Jovi, Amish It Head, Oozing SD, Pubic
Housing, Shemale Man, Florence Wallbanger; Visitors: Brigham Tongue, The Buttler
Hit It (Boston Moon Hash); Virgins: Just Jesse, Just Anna, Just Ben;
Late-cummers: Fuwangi Boner, Dicks on Broadway, Basket Boom Boom, Hairy
Krishna.
The Run:
Virgin territory, virgin hare, and three virgins, all in one
night. And visitors, too. What is the RIH3 coming to? Pretty soon, we’ll be
twittering. But best of all, 6:30, and no Basket!
Starting from a Middle School in Norton, MA, the hash was eagerly prompt in
setting off on trail, heading north east behind the school, leaving some anxious
looking parents behind in the parking lot.
Trail led into some brush and swampy ground, but quickly came out
to W. Main Street. A short pavement segment and they found trail turning back
into the woods, now northwest. They headed briefly on a dirt road, and a check
sent them east for a meaningless loop. Back on track, they continued northwest,
well away from the Wading River. A few checks tantalized, but gave no
satisfaction.
The pack came to a check that looped them back south. WHO found marks and followed a narrow concrete dam on a
pond. The snow on the ledge was promising, but no one managed to slip and test
the thin ice of the pond. It turned out to be just a long falsie. The pack
turned around. There was great confusion. Finally, true trail was found, heading
north and then east to the beer check. Less than 30 minutes had
passed.
The beer check was of course marked by prolonged singing, in honor
of the virgins. It was at least partially ruined by the appearance of
late-cummers Basket and Fuwangi. And even Bondo made the
beer check. The virgins were confused by a Bondo
version of “The Wild West Show”. Actually, everyone was confused by the Bondo version of “The Wild West Show”. What else is
new?
Finishing up the pitiful supplies of beer, they were off, on-in.
Trail led southwest, crossing the Wading River. They hit a check with a falsie
that would have led to the most direct route back on the road, but no one was
smart enough to realize this. So they followed marks southeast on the other side
of the river pretty much straight back to the school. They circled
up.
The run was rated. Virgin, virgin, virgins; minimal pavement, hash
completed in one hour. Looked good for the hare briefly. However, Bondo, Basket, nobody waist deep
in a frozen pond, and minimal shiggy. Total: +0. The visitors were punished, and
duly sang. The virgins were interrogated, and I believe, told a joke. Hashit
went to Wee Balls. I’m not about to start remembering
why, at this point in my life. And Wee Balls is
denying everything. Finishing up, they went to a restaurant. It probably was
Wetherlaines. But WHO can
remember?
On On