Plenty of Tirds at Tird Beach<br>
Run#  1353<br>
Date: March 5, 2012<br>
Hare: Crabby Shag and Last of the Spread Cheekins<br>
Location: Tird Beach, Newport, RI<br>
Weather: Windy and fuckin' cold under the kilt<br>
Present: Crabby, Ass Quack, Oozing, DOB, Fuwangii, Rusty, WIPOS, Shemale, Crisco, others<br>
Hashit: Basket<br><br>
Tird beach, does that bring up a vision of what this trail will bring? The d'Erections gave a few fortunate Wankers an opportunity to give the Hash a miss, but unfortunately only Crotch Tiger was smart enough to say fuck it. The pack was long since gone as I drove westerly on Sauchuest Point Road. I spotted Rusty making his way towards me, and asking him where the parking was, he opted to hop in and show me. Next we picked up Shemale. He asked where we were going, and I replied back to the parking lot. Rusty ASSured him he knew where the trail was going and that it would be prudent to start from the lot and head off in a different direction. We stopped to pick up WIPOS, but he chose to continue on he merry way. A smart decision!<br>
Rusty and Shemale started out towards Third Beach Road as I changed into something more comfortable, my kilt. I decided to take the WIPOS direction and went back onto Sauchuest Point Road. Thought I'd jump over the Hanging Rock fence and find a possible shortcut to the beer stop. As I rounded the corner of Hanging Rock Road, I heard WIPOS call and together we navigated over the fence without the barbed wire snagging something 'neath the kilt. WIPOS followed my lead and as we reached to top of the crag we could hear the pack heckling us from across the swamp. Looking to find an easy route to them we started running along the path and bumped into Rusty and Shemale coming in the opposite direction. Finding a "B" at our feet, we decided to have our own Beer Stop.<br>
Beer Stop #1 was having a good time at our expense and there was much chanting back and forth as to which beer stop was better. "The other beer stop sucks!" "The other beer stop blows!" It was pretty loud and obnoxious. Beer Stop #2 was a little more sedate, but the beer was good and it was where we were. There was no need to move and we did our best to finish off all the good beer before the pack made their way to our neck 'o the woods.<br>
I hadn't stopped for a break since lunch sitting at my desk, and there was a powerful pressure building under my kilt. I decided to leave small package upwind of Beer Stop #2 for the Wankers when they finally arrive. Eventually, we saw the headlamps start to stir and the noise quieted down, from the bad beer stop, as they ran from #1 to #2. <br>I thought #2 was appropriate and we giggled as we thought how close to the bag of beer was the pile of shit. Fuwangii was first followed by someone from the Black Shoe (no he didn't step in it...yet), and then Wee Balls. After finding the present I left for them, Wee Balls said he had the same experience on the other shore. It was a two tird Hash.<br>
The remainder of BS#1 made it to BS#2 and after finding little more that spittle and shite, we all finished our beers and vacated the place. Working our way back to the parking lot, some went one way, some the other, but eventually all made it to the circle. The Hare, Crabby Shag, stood alone in the center, as her co-Hare decided it would be a shit-show and blew us off. The circle was short and sweet, as the Park Police were checking out all the local watering holes on the beach. Down-downs were given to the Black Shoe virgin to RIH3 and the Crisco Kid got one for Backsliding. Eventually the discussion turned towards Hashit and I got it because my pile was bigger and smellier than Wee Balls. Of course everyone knows Wee Balls is smaller.<br>
The OnOn was at CJ's Pub, a long time NH3 hang out, where Ass Quack is now a regular. He even has his own mug with his name on it. It didn't take long before he had to empty his bladder and that mug made its way around the table like stink on my poop. Returning he was a bit upset that his prized possesion was stolen. Will it ever return? Will he be just a regular drunk sitting at the bar with a regular mug? Will Crabby marry a mug-less Wank? Time will tell, but for now that's all I've got.<br>
See you at the Hash. OnOn
Basket