The Another Run around the Park Hash
Run # 1468
Date May 19, 2014
Hare: Next Week
Location: Ryan Park, RI Weather: Sunny and warm
The Pack: OOzing, WHO, Basket, Amish, Heath, Bondo, Buddy, Donkey, Pubic, WIPOS, Ass Quack, Crabby Shag, Rusty, Crotchy, Pussy Galore, Luxury Box, Hairy Visitors: Just Chris and his Brother Just Mickey WHO was doing his best to drink all Bondo's beer before the hash in an attempt to make a fool of himself later on, but that's hard to do at RIH3. Hashit: WIPOS

Bondo was sharing his home brew with anyone WHO could find a cup and it was going down so fast he feared he may not have enough for himself if he decides to blow off the Hash, if it gets too long, and go back for a beer mid-trail. The visitors were on cup #3 and we all tried to warn them of the effects. For some it's just a bad hangover, others, like me, get a case of the shits that could last for days, still others find themselves in a comma and need to be shoveled into their cars and transported home. Such was the case tonight.

The Hare gave instructions and pointed out of the parking lot on Layafette Rd to the trail. At the first check, the pack went right, left and wrong. Right was right, but of few of us continued on in the hopes that the Hare may have circled back. Finally giving up, me, Ass Quack and Amish bushwhacked up the hill and back onto trail. Crabby was back from running a real race somewhere in Maryland, and had a brand new racist t-shirt to prove she's better than the rest of us....but we knew that already. It's just her choice of men that we question. The trail meandered along the ridge and finally coming out at an open field. Where a good check had us all fooled for a while. OOzing found the flour heading down a hill into the woods, while most everyone continued down the power line or out to the highway. Finally, OOzing called us on and we followed like sheep or in this case alpacas.

We ran along the trails out towards Belleville Pond and found beer at a scenic spot thick with mosquitoes and horse flies, just as the sun set over the pond. It was beautiful and our singing floated wonderfully across the pond to the enjoyment of the fishermen. The singing didn't last very long, as the Hare failed to bring enough beer for round two, so we were back on trail to the circle. The trail back was straight back to the Hare's farm. A fire was burning bright and the alpaca were running from all the commotion in the field. A tour of the chicken coup was rewarded by a real red cock crowing and an opportunity to reach under a hen for your own egg for breakfast.

The Hare got his down-down for shitty trail with a ratihng of negative zero. Virgin Just Mike got one as did his brother, Just Chris, WHO was name by some Hash down south Messa something..??? Bondo got a DD for trying to fuckup Just Mickey with his beer. and WIPOS got Hashit for trying to abuse the animals. Then most of us traveled to Oak Hill Tavern before heading home. Just Mike and Chris needed a ride home, so I offered them a ride. About two tirds there, Just Mike felt the effects of Bondo Brew and asked me to pull over for a minute. After leaving most of what he had consumed this evening, and possibly all week, on the sidewalk we continued to their home in Warwick and I drove the remaining way to Burrillville with the satisfaction that Dog Meat's car's back seat would not need a good cleaning in the morning.
That's all I got. Basket