Run #: 1473, Retar'd's Return Hash
Date: June 23, 2014
Pack: WHO, WIPOS, Shemale, Hairy, Rusty, Basket, Amish, Heath, Luxury Box, Pubic Housing, Donkey Punch, OOzing, Crabby Shag, Just Pat, Bondo, Bondo's dog Buddy and Bondo's really close friend soon to be named Smells Like Fish.
Retar'd has recently returned from SE Asia having studied Hashing in that part of the world that invented our wonderful sport and lifestyle. He said he's much smarter now and wanted to have a go at the same location he's screwed up the last two times he's Hared for RIH3. So with high expectations and talk of not meeting the two women he's bumped into on the last two trails asking, "How do I get bahk to the cah pahk?". It's a simple thing, just drop bread crumbs on the way out and follow them on the way back. Beer bottles and dead fish work just as well. Spirits were high as Hashers congregated at the parking area on Taunton Avenue. Bondo had his truck bar opened for business and Hashers were throwing back pints of his brew. Discussion about last week's Hash were the topic of the night, when Bondo asked for help from a civilian, WHO was suppose to clean up the dead fish found at the beer stop on Spring Lake. When the Hash arrived the smell of fish was unbelievable as the fish were lightly tossed into the woods just a few feet from the beer and fermenting very nicely. Suggestions for naming him Smells Like Fish was tossed around, but tabled until later. Maybe we'll name him next week.
At the 6:30 bell, we started out northerly, then turning westward towards the thick of the forest. Ass Quack and I took a left at the first check towards the tunnel under 495. No flour was found but calls of OnOn further up the old trolly bed was heard, and we turned around. The next check caught me again as I went left again towards the highway, and followed a wonderful trail that should have had flour, but didn't. Eventually I could not hear the Hash calling OnOn as it was drowned out by the noise of traffic or distance from true trail, so I started taking trails that took me eastward. Eventually I came out on Beach Street and went right. Just before the intersection with Taunton, there were flour marks that led downhill towards to cars and then left into the woods. It was a short distance to the beer stop. The pack was already on their way of finishing the beer, but Hairy offered me a bottle of IPA. After checking the temperature, I enjoyed what was left and half-started a few songs that were already sung.
The Hare suggested running back along the road, but some of us WHO have been here a few times followed the trail that parallels the street and arrived back at the cars just as the sissies, that chose pavement over sand, arrived. The circle was formed just behind the parking area and the Hare was congratulated for a job well done with a negative 69 rating. Two-timer Smells Like Fish got his down-down as well as other for various offenses. Eventually, the Hashit was bestowed on me for being lost on trail, and the ceremonies ended with a number of our favorite songs. The pack made its way to the Chieftan and cold beer, sandwiches and liver and Onions was enjoyed, before heading home for the night. OnOn B3