February 9, 2015, RIH3 Run # 1506
The Tird Monday Snow-day Hash
Location: 157 Meadow Rd, Woonsocket, RI
Pack: OOzing, Basket, Just KC, Just Big Shit, Dog Meat, and Jovi Juice
Temp: Snowing yet again
Bondo was stuffing wood...into his stove when I pulled into his driveway. It was just the two of us, as Dog Meat joined Just Big Shit upstairs for some wine. It seemed that we were going to have a Marco moment, when suddenly OOzing and Just KC miraculously appeared. We considered staying in the warm garage, after Bondo saying he made a map for us to follow and not a single inch of trail was laid. He tried to lie, of course and say there was flour under the snow, but we'd have none of it. The beer was good and the garage was warm. Bondo put on a backpack filled with beer and started out towards the beer stop. We waited a few moments as we finished the beer, and after reading the map, we travelled down his driveway and went right on Meadow to Woodland then another right. The directions said to make a right on Upland then left on Lyman. If you look at the map, there is no intersection with Lyman from Woodland, you have to go left on Oakley then Right on Lyman. Bondo had a senior moment when he made this map, as he's been living in this area for over 62 years....HELLO.
We continued to a left on Meadow and ended up at his son's house on Highland St across from Cold Spring Park. A fire was going strong as we arrived. I told Bondo his map was wrong and he argued his map as being correct (he's never wrong...I hate people like that). He asked if we made a left on Glen and I told him there was no Glen after Lyman. It wasn't until I looked at a 'real' map that I noticed his mistake, and we had to go to Oakley before finding Lyman. He should have sent us left on Glen after Upland, then right on Oakley and left on Lyman. Then the map makes sense to follow over Harris, to Highland and the BS. We only did half the trail he expected us to take, but our trail was tree times as long as the trail the Hare actually set, as he walked down Meadow to his son's house. If that's confusing, as most of Woonsocket is, see the attached jpg.
We arrived a Jovi Juice's house as a roaring fire was going. Bondo had pints of his beer stuffed in the surrounding snow. As a small group, we tried to sing a few songs. Jovi Juice had a chair, without a back, and placed it in the fire to burn. Bondo decided to stand on the chair and offer himself in effigy. Unfortunately, he stepped off before the legs collapsed and was engulfed in the flames. The beer was finished and we walked the block and a half to Bondo's garage. OOzing stopped upstairs to grab Dog Meat and Just Big Shit, and a circle of 5 surrounded the Hare. The discussion of his lack of effort was short and to the point. The trail sucked, despite perfect conditions. The beer was good, but since he did nothing in setting trail and gave us an incorrect map, we made our own trail and found the beer, despite his best efforts to the contrary. The run was rated a negative 69. Just KC's naming was discussed and she stood in the corner of the garage, not listening to our discussion. OOzing said she took an etiquette class in college, so he suggested naming her Eticlit. All agreed and so it was. Hashit was given to me for not following the map, and my consternation, since it was obvious to me at least, that the map was wrong. We went inside for some very hot venison chili and Bondo Beer, then we all traveled home for the night.
That's all I got.