Run #1640: Retar'd's Virgins Hash
Time: 6.30 pm
Date: Aug 14, 2017
Start: The Monastery, Cumberland
Pack: Rusty, Basket, Crotchy, Hamster (and his dog), Sleeping Booty, O'Boner, OOzing, Just Pat, Finass Cuntsultant, PG (and her dog), a Virgin, a visitor from Pittsburgh, and a cameo by Fuwangii
The Hash was promised virgin territory and it might have been 69 or more years since OOzing and the other Pakistani birthday celebrants were last at the Monastery with Retar'd, who was last seen more than 69 years ago with RIH3, but even I (who has only been associating with RIH3 for about 6.9 months) had been here before. In any case, the pack set off into the woods and soon found that there were several checks, and at one point along the way, the hare had changed his mind about 69 times concerning the direction of the trail before deciding to send the pack back the way it had come with a CB.
Despite his best efforts to confuse the pack and keep all of the beer to himself, soon enough the pack located the BN at the bottom of a not-obvious-at-all hill. The beer was located at the Nine Men's Misery monument and the pack gathered for some beer and to sing a few songs. Apparently, there was 69 pounds of flour out on the trail because a visitor from Pittsburgh arrived at the beer stop and slaked her thirst with the pack. Sleeping Booty attempted to summon 69 demons atop the grave site, and was soon joined by Basket and a cabal of about 69 hashers. Since the infernal host couldn't be bothered to attend the hash, the pack departed the beer stop. The out trail was a grueling .69 miles back to the parking lot, where the pack was met by Fuwangii who just wanted to stop by and join us for a beer. While at the circle songs were sung, OOzing blathered on in Urdu something about Pakistan and India, and somehow I ended up being the Hashit. For the On-After, the pack convened at J Gray's where the Pennsylvanian visitor and Basket traded stories of the good old days before she decided to tell us erroneously that she was buying the pack dinner. The visitor invited the pack to Pittsburgh, and promised free beer upon arrival instead. Some hashers have already booked the trip.
Hamster In The Tailpipe