Run #1642: The Krisko Kid Hash
Time: 6.30 pm
Date: Aug 28, 2017
Hare: Krisko Kid, Just Mark (homeowner) and Basket (maybe/maybe not)
Start: 107 Joe Sweet Rd, Chepachet, RI
Pack: Rusty, WIPOS, WHO, Crotch Tiger, Butt Plug, Fecal Veneer, Just Pat, Hamster,
Visitors: Earned My Dolla For Every Dick (SeattleH3), and My Precious (Arazona H3), Easy Entry and I Fuck Your Sister (Rotten Grotton H3)
Hashit: WIPOS

The property owner warned our Hare, Krisko Kid, that there was a black bear roaming in the woods behind his house. It took KK almost 2 seconds to tell him he'd be interested in laying flour there for the RIH3. It was almost a year to the day, that KK layed flour on Narrows Rd in Bristol, but this time he didn't lose his phone...just his self respect. To say the trail was short is like saying the sky is blue or the bear does shit in the woods and there was plenty of proof about that.

The home owner, just Mark, was thrilled to have guests. He was thrilled to have the Hash break up his mondane mid-week activities. He was thrilled to have singing in the woods to keep the damned bear away. But mostly he was thrilled about the free beer. He lives so far out in Timbuktu, that any interaction with anyone was welcomed. Hell, he's usually found dropping mail in the most remote boxes in rual RI that even the dogs don't chase him...sad. The pack started arriving just before the 6:30 start. Two visitors from Roten Grotten H3 were already there when I arrived. Trivia Question: Did you know WHO coined the phrase "Rotten Grotten". WHO did not coin the phrase, it was me....but I digress. Two other visitors arrived shortly thereafter: EMDFED Seattle, and My Precious from Zonna.

Others were already enjoying a beer: WIPOS, Fecal, Rusty, Hamster, WHO, followed by Butt Plug and Just Pat in pants. Crotchy arrived just after leaving trail, still early for Crotchy time.

The trail started out with mixed directions from our Hare. BN no B, but beer won't be found there, just kinda close so beware. Also beware of the black bear. Much scat was found along the trail, but if you're calling ONOn, blowing whistles and horns, it shouldn't be a problem. If you do get attacked, you get your dollar Hash Cash back...guaranteed. No False Trail Marks, tree and you're on...mostly, unless your not. We left safety of the parking area and followed a trail left around the house, heading easterly, leading us downhill and across a few rocky spots that would have water running through it if it weren't August and a very dry one at that. A check was found and the pack looked up and down, OOzing found flour eventually heading due west then northerly up a hill. We came across what looked like a hobo camp. Chairs were strewn about and a few beer cans proving that people can enjoythemselves almost anywhere, even in bear country. A couple more checks had the pack split up into 2 groups. The Finders (those looking for trail and moving in a direction), and the Losers (those playing switch until someone points out trail). You know how to play switch, don't you? Stick your right thumb up your ass and your left thumb in you mouth....then switch.

Beer was found at the next hobo camp. A time check had us with beers in-hand at 13 minutes. Almost a new record, but nobody complained, except for that guy from Arazona. Actually the hobo camp was one of tree areas set up by the homeowner so he could enjoy his property while pulling in wood for the winter. The Beer Stop was on a high hill overlooking the (now dry) wet/swampy area low ground. Many songs were enjoyed as well as a good sampling of beer. The losers finally arrive and singing continued until the well went dry. Pointing out trail, in a Krisko way, the pack split into 2 groups. The Finders (those that moved in a directions and found flour) and the Losers (those folks that may not have enjoyed the first game of switch, but put up with the shitty taste and let someone else find flour). Eventually, we were all back on trail leading out to Joe Sweet Road. A quarter mile uphill and we were back for the circle.

Just Mark happily joined Krisko in the circle as remarks were started. OOzing protested that I should join them, but as I did not lay one bit of flour on trail and had only the vaguest of knowledge about the trail, I declined. Still there was protest since I did recce the area last week, under protest I joined the two in the circle. Comments were mostly good: short, beer, no bear, nobody got hurt, back before dark and no pavement. Still the rating was a negative .69. DD's were carried out in proper fashion and a rousing singing of "Hello Penis My Old Friend" was sung. Backsliders were ordered to enter the circle, and OOzing decided Krisko was deserving. However Krisko was at last week's Hash, so OOzing put his tail between his legs and begged off. Visitors were invited to enter the fray and they were questioned by Basket and a number of thoughts from the peanut gallery. They had their DD and sang a short ditty. Hashit was next and after much thoughtful deliberations, WIPOS won the award. He had his DD and started the "Masterbation" song. Luckily it did not go too far. Circle completed, we traveled to Crystal Lake Golf Course for food and beer.
Still the complaining continued, but that's the Hash, so most left satisfied.