Run 1828: Wipos Best Worst Run Ever<br/>
March 8, 2021<br/>
Hare: Wipos<br/>
Hashers: Rusty, Basket, Dr. Who, CrackerJackOff, Amish and Ralph, Pubic Housing, Crotch Tiger<br/>
Hashit: Donkey Punch<br/><br/>

 

I am not one to complain - but we all got Wiposed again. The start was at the new parking lot at 97 Dexter Street in Seekonk, A new twist on the Seekonk library trails. Wipos declared before the trail that this might be his worst trail ever – and that is saying a lot (see the write up for run 1312!!!!!)<br/><br/>

IT was a perfect night for hashing, 29 degrees at the start after a warm day that melted away almost all of the remaining snow. The pack was out at 6:30 prompt  - the initial portion of the trail was brilliant, wide dry trails, well-marked and fast paced. After three unremarkable checks the fourth check was a whiskey check where Wipos produced the smallest bottle of Bailys Irish cream I have ever seen  - and in typical fashion he only had 9 cups for 10 hashers. After the whiskey check the trail continued to be one of the finest Wipos trails I have attended – well marked, just tricky enough to keep the pack together but not a cluster F.
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Then it went sideways
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The trail winded behind the Seekonk library and there was a tricky turn up a hill into the shiggy that some of the FRB’s missed that wound to the north of the library trails. Eventually leading to the series of collapsed bridges that lead through the swamp over to the adjacent private property trails that wipos has runs us through in the past. After the bridges was a long unnecessary circle jerk that ran through the shiggy and roads that eventually lead back to the bridges to take us back to the library trails. Some how I was the FRB and ran the circle jerk so fast (bragging) that I caught up to Dr. Who, Pubic Housing and the hare who were so DFL that they were able to bail on the circle jerk. After another tenuous tromp across the dilapidated bridges and swamp that is when the trail went all Wipos.
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There were no marks to be found anywhere leading back to the trail. I wandered around for a while in the shiggy until I came back to the main trail and just assumed it continued that direction. There were no marks for about a half mile. I finally found a mark, - it was on the back of a tree at the bottom – it was confusing as if I was on trail. But since it was Wipos I assumed I was on. The trail had a series of 10 checks, all that lead straight along the reservoir for over a mile. Eventually I found a "BN" mark and continued straight into the shiggy only to find the marks ended or just went in a loop. After 15 Minutes of searching Basket, Amish and Ralph showed up to also not be able to find marks. We eventually backtracked and just went in the opposite direction - because again - it was wipos.
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The entire pack somehow short cutted to the beer stop and met us with a rounding rendition of asshole. Beer was adequate, I do not know who got the the Capitan’s Daughter - I assumed it was Rusty as he bragged that he did not do the circle jerk and found the beer 30 minutes prior to the next hasher showing up - but for some reason he did not get that hashit for that (but I am not one to complain)
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The trail ended by a march along the pavement back to the parking lot.
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The circle rated the trail a -0, possible the highest rating ever for a wipos trail.
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Several crimes were committed on trail but Donkey got hashit for Being Donkey (which as always is a completely legitimate misconduct worthy of hashit)
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One of the announcements was that Basket claims he is the only one who does hash write ups so this document is proof that that is a falsehood and Donkey deserves resignation and praise.
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Good Trail - great weather - reasonable sized pack
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Fuck Covid and Daylight savings
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DONKEY