Run # 1889 Moshassuck Sucks Hash<br/>
Hare: O'Boner<br/>
Present: Basket, Rusty, Amish, WHO, WIPOS, Just Pat, Glutenless Maximus, Do Me Something, Pussy Galore, Cracker Jack Off, Satay Man<br/>
Location: Moshassuck River Preserve<br/>
Hashit: WHO! WHY?<br/><br/>
The Run:The group gathered at the small parking lot next to the golf clubhouse, with much jockeying for parking positions. The hare rolled in at 1825, with whining, excuses, and blocking hashers and civies alike with her parking. With great trepidation, the pack was off at 1831.<br/><br/>
From my (gimp) perspective, the pack was gone. Thankfully, I didn't have to see any of them for over 2 miles. The trails were marked with flour. but also with blue and yellow blazes to support Ukraine. Trail was straight and imaginative. Blue to a bushwhack (ignored by your scribe) to more Blue and then: Surprise! Yellow. A few stream crossings, some avoidable mud, just blooming poison ivy, and No THORNS! All roads lead to Rome, but in Lincoln, all roads lead to the Lodge. And the Beer Check. By the rocks overlooking the YMCA pond.<br/><br/>
The hare, in an effort to get positive rating at the circle, provided FOUR Captain's Daughters. Naturally, your scribe arrived too late for one of them. You all know I've had two BACK SURGERIES THIS YEAR! You'd think one of them could have been saved. After all, I consistently beat WIPOS to the circle, even with my ski pole. But with a Hazy IPA and a few songs,I was OK. "Pubic hair" for the visitor was excellent. I didn't take any of the superspreader snacks, and I stayed away from Basket.<br/><br/>
On back was straightforward. If you had a phone with GPS. No marks on the short way, but we all made it to the "No cigarettes under Tulips" sign by the fireplace, for the circle. Brother Gill showed up, looking for a free beer, and was welcomed. He said he hadn't been hashing because of his treatment for a brain tumor. He doesn't get it. Most of us have brain damage of far worse levels than he does. Just look at Basket. And we keep going. Ratings were obnoxiously good, because most were concerned about the hare's defection to Boston. Nevertheless, I trumped the pack as my feet were dry, and I was not bleeding. -0! The hare did a down-down and sang.<br/><br/>
Backsliders Glutenless and Satay came in and were questioned. All answers were either incorrect or incomprehensible. Satay told a joke/Horror story. I still have nightmares. The Boston visitor came in and got none of Basket's questions right. Good work! Finally, Hashit nominations began. Amish started by breaking the leg of the current deer heinie hashit. Wouldn't that, in a rational world, be enough? Somehow, the malignant spirits inspired the pack to nominate me. Wankers! If this happens again, I'll have to give positive ratings for EVERY RUN! I was going to make them suffer with Abdul the Bulbul Emir, but I wasn't sure I could remember all the twiddly bits. So I gave them a Flanders and Swann classic, slightly modified, that left them gasping and whispering: "Let's not let him sing again"<br/><br/>
Circle over, the pack went to the Lodge, I went to Salem with a broken deer haunch in my hatchback. The Massachusetts Medical Society may have something to say about that!