Run of the Year!
Run # 566 April 7, 1997
Hare: Async
Hashit:: Basket
by Snot
It was next to Tarbox Pond in West Greenwich where this memorable run took place. In attendance was Async (hare), Basket Boom Boom, Beyond Hope, Deep Throat, Little Neck, Oozing Syph, Rusty, Itchy Bro and yours truly. The conditions were absolutely perfect at 50 degrees F with an extra hour of light.
The run started off by the side of the pond quickly converging into the first of many wet crossings, some of us elected to go the dry route but Basket being up to his short fat hairy knees in shit was determined to get every body as wet as he was. The run continued through scenic areas with your scribe as usual at the back after taking the first two checks in the wrong bloody direction. Deep Throat was even further back not wishing to get her dainty little plates of meat wet (feet), taking huge detours that even Hopeless would have been proud of.
Before long it was obvious the checks were not well placed as the Gazelles of the RIH3 spread the pack very thin, and some of us who will remain nameless (the one who normally has a communicator with him) forgetting to call on trail, hence your scribe was on his own checking out all the checks, always going up the falsie first. [editor's note: the scribe is indulging in blatant whining at this point] I cannot believe I never lose 10 lb’s on these runs. Again I had been shafted by a cunning hare, found myself going up a track off trail, after a brief retrace I found myself back on trail in the middle of a quarry with a check that could have gone anywhere-you Bastard. This time however seeing no footprints in the areas you were expecting me to go I followed the obvious trail which halfway up the precarious climb, I heard the fart of Basket and shouts of “down here you slow Bastard”-or words to that effect. Eventually finding my way to the first beer stop after having to get wet just to get a beer, which was well worth it I have to say. Deep Throat was the only one still missing but Async offered to go look for her, why didn’t he bother looking for me I ask myself.
No sooner had I got my lips to the beer the pack was off on the second leg, with your scribe hardly catching a breather. Again before I finished my beer the bastards were out of site, I’m getting quite used to running solo now! Seeing as the checks were obviously crap, even I only got one wrong. [editor's note: the whining scribe is obviously badly out of shape] The path led down to a rocky area where the hare had set up a fire to mark our second beer stop, a great area the only blemish being the beer-which was a lemon, piss tasting shit, which lost you a mark on the rating. fortunately there was some other shit which we were just able to drink.
After nearly an hours worth of running it was still daylight with the odd mosquito coming out for a bite, songs and jokes for which your scribe was given a down down, which I nearly choked on by the way, we put out the fire under the supervision of Hopeless and made our way back in twilight to the start point, with nobody missing, we circled up with the Hal-Bob comet in full view, we were all waiting to see if we were going to be beamed up by the aliens, then we realized we were the aliens still searching for the elixir of life-GOOD BEER!!!! The run was highly rated by Basket who gave a ten! without doubt this was the best set run for some time with exception to the lousy checks and the shitty beer it was worth a 6.5 in anybody’s book and the only positive mark awarded since I have been running with the RIH3. Ceremonies completed the Hashshit award went to Basket. The on-on was at Nicki’s which has the connotation of scantily dressed women was no more than a doss house and was the low point of the whole evening and sent a good positive mark into the negative category, Budweiser or Coors on tap is only a marginal improvement over tap water, the subs were OK but this must be the worst dive we have been in for a year. Never the less a memorable evening, good job Async, shame about the beer.
On-On
Snot (43rd Run in RI)