Hash Event: New England Red Dress run (RIH3)

The Start, the run and beer check

We started the run closer to 3 p.m. .. which gave ample time for those who had attempted to follow the incorrect directions from Boston to find the State Capitol. It was a fine sunny afternoon in Providence. We, in varying shades of red, assembled in a parking lot across the street from the State Capitol. Basket blew his horn and we circled up. Rodent Feltcher had a very well accessorized red prom dress ... a pink handbag and belt, plus black high-heeled sandals, which he had to change for running shoes prior to the start. Friar F was wearing an ensemble that was more fuchsia than red. Fudgesuckle, in a lovely new red dress with black sequins, drove to the start in an open Jeep, full of guys in red dresses (must have made quite an impression on 95). A gay pride rally was taking place in Providence, and most passersby assumed we were somehow connected with the rally.

We ran around through the new part of Providence with a water feature plus little row boats (it didn't used to be there, but what the hey). The tourists loved us. We ran around downtown, past two street fairs, and on up into venerable Brown University. You can tell this is liberal academia, as most folks were very interested in who we were, and why we were doing it (we should have had hand-outs, the constant explanations slowed me down). Somewhere on the way up the hill, we lost 3 Boston hashers and 3 Newport Hashers. They never made it to the beer check and were late to the on-in (do not cry for them, they stayed at a street fair, danced to live music and hopefully found a few beers). The run had multiple checks and occasional lapses in mark setting ... most, but not all, found the way to the beer check, which was on an old abandoned RR trestle (over water, with no handrails, and a few missing links in the bridge). NOPE ... the phobics (or the sane), opted to stay on land and forego the beer. However, the Hash is not without a heart ... several of those who were undeterred by the over-water less than stable bridge opted to bring back beer to the phobics (Rodent Feltcher also brought us a loaf of bread). Never say Hashers don't care!

After the beer check to the on-in, whatever

Well, after the beer check ... the trail hit major league shiggy and a tunnel under roads that had no lights whatsoever. Some opted for the alterna-trail. The trail went into Brown's athletic fields, but only if one was able to use the pallet which was placed against a 6 foot wall/fence combo. Some hashers decided to run around. Depending on which side one chose, one would be hopelessly lost without trail. Fortunately, all one needed to do is ask any local the question: "Excuse me, have you seen a bunch of odd folks run by wearing red dresses? ... I am trying to find them." I found the on-in that way (but still had to explain hashing to at least 3 bunches of Sunday fun folks in Providence).

Well, so, after stuffing ourselves with food prepared by Bondo and who knows who else (thank you, it was quite good!!), and drinking a sh*t-load of beer from the Trinity Brew Pub (we had kegs, yahoo!), the 6 lost hashers finally wormed their way back to the on-in. We had a circle. Abused the hares, as usual. Basket probably removed his dress (but, as he always takes his clothes off, I would not have noticed). We invited visitors into the circle (from other than RI, Newport and Boston). We accused folks of various offenses etc.

There was the naming of two Boston Hashers - Ally got named Hairless Fish Nut Jeff got named Cabana Boy. Hey, I only report what happened !!!

Then, a couple of Oozing's neighbors attempted to park in the lot and go inside. They became unwitting spontaneous virgins at the circle: Liz and Oozing's orthopedic doctor (whose name was immediately forgotten by YHS, the "name-challenged"). The neighbors were good sports and did their down down with ease.

Comment of the afternoon

"I own more red dresses than suits" - one of the male harriers (to which two other harriers responded that this was the same situation for them). Other comment heard regarding difficulty in finding an appropriate red dress: "I may look ridiculous, but I don't want to look bad!"

--- CA (delinquent Boston Scribe ... just shut up and give me a down down, dammit)

P.S. --- being a complete bozo with names (unless I take notes), I asked Shine On for help. Here is a NEWS FLASH: While trimming trees Sunday, her ladder fell. She fell on the ladder, and broke her right arm!!! All hashers may sign Shin On's cast at Sunday's Blue Hills hash.