Finding Oozing's Beaver Hash

Run #933, March 8, 2004

Hare: Oozing SD

Location: Beaver River Preserve, Richmond

Weather: Low to Mid 30's, Snowing

Present: SESYB (co-hare), The Slasher Dr WHO, Async, Bondo Jovi, WIPOS, Basket Boom Boom, Seamus, Jake, Ben.

The Run:

The d’erections to the start were for once, clear concise and easy to follow. Dr WHO arrived early, followed by Bondo, Async, WIPOS and Basket. But there was no sign of the hare. Six-thirty was past, and the group fanned out into the woods looking for marks. Finally, they headed up Fox Ridge Road, where Basket discovered the hare and cohare smooching in their car. (And maybe more, but he’s not talking.) The hare could not even follow his own d’erections. Come on! Even Bondo could! The group drove up to the hare’s parking place at the other end of Fox Ridge road, and began the hash at 7:15, nearly breaking the Raging Queen’s record start time at Great Swamp.

Trail lead north into the Beaver River Preserve. A check mark scattered the group, and the hare and cohare had to call them back to head east on some small paths. Several small brooks were crossed on plankways, and footprints in the falling snow made this easy until they started to bushwhack. Trail became obscure and the hare had to give some hints until he too became lost while crossing the Beaver River.

It would have been comical if it had not been so pathetic. Hare and cohare led through a maze of bushes and briars. Any footprints to be seen were obscured by the dogs and wandering hashers. The eastern side of the river was followed until at last the hare found the path. This led to a deep bog overflowing the path, and they indicated that trail went forward. Surprisingly quiet, Bondo led the way. WHO and Async followed. Basket whined. WIPOS held back, and tried without success to find an alternate route that did not involve thigh deep water. He did find some thorns.

Climbing a hill on the far side of the bog, the BC was found. Beer was enjoyed, especially while following the tortured progress of WIPOS in the briar patch on the other side of the bog. Trail back was straightforward. North, then west crossing the river on plankways again, and then turning back south to the entrance.

The circle was held just inside the Preserve entrance. Ratings were obviously reflective of the brilliance of the run. The d’erections alone were worth a 69! (Maybe that’s what was going on at the “start” in the hare’s car while they waited for the hashers to arrive!) Snowing, bog crossing, hare-loss on trail, WIPOS in the thorns. Total: 6.9! Hashit: who but Basket, for substantial whining.

On On On they went to Mark’s at exit 6 not 6A for another ending to another wasted evening in the poor and wretched lives of the members of the RIH3. But WHO wouldn’t be delighted to be a part of this? WHO keeps showing up, week after week? And WHO keeps doing these stupid write-ups, God knows why!

On On