Cady’s Farewell to Smoking Hash

Run #986, Feb 28, 2005.

Hare:  Async

Location:  Cady’s, Glocester.

Weather:  High 20’s, windy, snowing.

Present:  Dry Foot Fairy, Dr WHO, Oozing SD, SESYB, Basket Boom Boom, Bondo Jovi, Beyond Hope, Ben, Seamus.

Not Present (week 8):  Just Ariana.

The Run:

For the last night of restaurant smoking in the state of Rhode Island, the hare chose his locale based upon the local eatery, rather than upon the quality of the trail. This was understandable. How could this run not end up at Cady’s, the grungiest, smelliest, smokiest bar in the northeast. Predicted snow was holding off, so the usual group showed up on time to smell the fumes from the bar as well as from a tractor-trailer rig with its engine on in the parking lot. The hare gave instructions and they were off.

They ran east on 44 to the first mark which turned them north past some boulders into the woods on a path. Trail gradually turned, and joined the George Washington Management area’s network of trails. No surprises for the hashers, but as they emerged on the Area’s access Road, there were plenty of surprises for a group of confused snowmobilers. They were packing it in for the evening, ready to go light a few up at Cady’s no doubt, when the unruly hashers, led by Dr WHO and Dry Foot Fairy burst out to the check mark on the road.

After a great deal of chaos, Dry Foot Fairy found trail briefly north on the road, and then turning west to the shoreline trail. This well-used and remembered path includes the red, blue and orange trails as well as the North-South Trail! They ran along the edges of the partly-thawed Wilbur Pond, and were spreading out when a check sent them in all different directions. But finally Bondo and Hopeless found marks on a secondary trail north to the Center trail. It was but a short jaunt from there to one of the camping shelters and the Beer Check.

The snow was now starting, and after a brief stop for a beer, they soon headed on out, south on the orange trail. There were few checks, and they all managed to stay together back to the second shelter, this one close to the Bowdish reservoir, where the hare had set the circle. The hare had planned a fire, and he and Bondo went off to search for the cache of wood. Bondo (woodsman extraordinaire, sometimes known as the “Last of the BOHICAns”*) was well-prepared to start a fire in the now rapidly falling snow. He had a starter log, a cube of nuclear fuel and a bottle of lighter fluid. Even so, it was some time before the fire was blazing and the circle could be started. Ratings for the run: no virgin territory, unnecessary use of the North-South trail, no one lost, no second or third degree burns on Bondo vs active snowfall, confused snowmobilers, bonfire, short trail. Total: 0.69. Hashit: Fuwangi, in absentia. They lingered for a short while to enjoy the fire, but the sight of Bondo attempting to set his posterior ablaze was too much, and they headed out the access road, and crossed 44 to Cady’s.

Cady’s lived up to all expectations: a drunken and rowdy trucker (whose rig was still spewing out diesel fumes in the parking lot) falling all over the floor, determined chain-smokers at the bar and the pool table, and cheeseburgers which must have been cooked over a cube of Bondo’s nuclear fuel as they were burnt so black as to be almost inedible. To cap it all off, Dry Foot Fairy decided to spend $7 to buy a pack of Newport Lights (?) for the table, so they all lit up to savor the moment. Hopeless and Basket even decided to remove the filters. It was pathetic. At last, the group made their way out into the driving snow, and very slowly made their ways back to their respective homes, reliving the evening from the smoky stench of their clothes on the way.

On On

* - BOHICA = “Bend over here it comes again”, for the uneducated wankers among us.